Geek Is Chic

Remember when being called a "geek" was an insult. Geeks were relegated to the outskirts of the High school social scene. They were often targeted for ridicule by the "cool kids" - the Homecoming queen and the captain of the football team. Times have changed; the information revolution has enabled geeks to rise up through the ranks of social strata and claim their rightful place. The queen and the captain are mere Barbie and Ken doll figureheads of a bygone era that went the way of the beauty pageant. Sure they look good, but they can't get your e-mail account up and running. Geek is synonymous with computer wizard. We look to them in awe, to rescue us from the chains of computer illiteracy and Web woes. Computer magazines have trendy little columns like "Geek Speak". Yes geek is chic. Computer literati, hackers, surfers, and web heads are king. I can't speak geek and I'm therefore sitting outside the winner's circle. I wish I wore glasses, so I could spazz tape one arm. Don't laugh! Fake glasses, complete with clear glass and glasses with spazz tape, were recent geek-turns-chic fashion trends. Why, if I had those glasses, I speculated, I'd wedge a little piece of Kleenex under the nosepiece, thereby announcing to the world that I had technical considerations far more important than mere physical appearance. Yes, I decided I might not speak geek, surf, or hack, but I could still cultivate a certain level of geek mystique. I'd get those glasses, I decided. Maybe I'd even rumple my hair a touch, and wear one shirttail out in a haphazard fashion. I'd pose as often as possible, bathed in the glare a computer screen, leaning back every so often to run my fingers through my hair in worried contemplation. I'd avoid the sun in order to enhance my indoor pallor. People would stop, look and whisper in reverent tones "She's quite the computer wizard, you know". I'd cautiously avoid the technically empowered inner circle, to hide my lack of computer expertise. I'd shoot for a lone-wolf-Web-rider kind of image. I'd bask in an aura of aloof superiority. I wouldn't be plagued with nuisance computer questions. The ordinary folk would give my overwhelming technical prowess a wide berth. My fantasy winked out as "super-geek" himself came cruising up the hallway. I noted in amazement that his eyes had actually landed on me. I gave him a cool nod, still partly immersed in my god of geek fantasy. His geekiness merely frowned and quickly turned his attention away. My dreams in tatters, I looked down to find my shimmering geek suit had turned back into the fluffy bimbo sweater I had put on that morning.